Change. Is it the jingly jangly shit in my pocket? Is it the random time between Winter and Spring? Or perhaps change is when I switch up my workout routine, get a 0.000001% raise or try a vegetarian diet for 3.25 months. I’ve written about change before and how accepting it has historically been challenging for me. That was a few years ago. Now, after I’ve undergone the most change I’ve experienced in life, here’s what I have to say: CHANGE CAN BE A CHOICE (if we choose it back).
Still with me? I’ll explain. It’s been some time since I have written a creative piece such as this. That’s because I spent the last *however many months* riding the f*cking tidal wave of life and my surfboard was a really sturdy toothpick. We all know this wave quite intimately, and when the wave crashes on the shore, the change hits. It can be incredible, amazing, “just-what-I-needed” redirecting change. Or perhaps it’s awful, life-altering, destructible change. Hell, it could be small but just as impactful as a fender bender or catching a bad flu that uses the only sick time you have left. Either way change is change but it is a choice and here’s why. We either change with it, or we don’t. When we choose to surf, we ~become~ the change (imagine the Smucker’s Goober PB and Jelly swirl spread). The change then becomes agreeable even when it’s awful because we adapt to it. When we embrace it or accept it (maybe after some time), the change becomes our new normal, our new life. Don’t get me wrong, in my experience, embracing change is the dumbest thing to be told. I hate hearing it. Even if I know logically that this annoying statement also doubles as a golden rule, (especially since we often wouldn’t know positive redirection if it slapped us in the face with a spatula) I still make a weird face when I hear it or see it.
These past 6-8 months have changed my perspective on change and how EmBrAcInG iT or whatever might actually benefit me?? That is because I knew change was coming (which didn’t feel like a choice), I refused to believe it or change with it for a little while, but when I realized that I was choosing to suffer, I took a step back and thought about it a little harder. After some emotional *adjusting* :’) I thought “hmm, maybe if I take it upon myself to move with the current, I might not drown.” Andddddddd that’s what I did. I began to shift my view of the world to what was within my realm of control: my thoughts, how I process my emotions and what I choose to do or not do (shoutout Mel Robbins Author of the Let Them Theory–groundbreaking book). Understanding what I could control HELPED me exponentially in understanding my choices when change arrives at my doorstep. I was able to relinquish control of the thoughts and fears that were holding me back. I wasn’t perfect, it wasn’t linear and it is still an ongoing journey, but it permanently altered my brain chemistry for the better.
Maybe all this makes sense, maybe it doesn’t. What I do know is this– change comes in all different shapes, sizes, colors, smells, vibes…and it’s going to happen whether we like it or not. It is then within OUR realm of power to release what we’re trying to control and move with the change, not against it. WAYYYY easier said than done, I know. BUT! Friends, my challenge to you is this: next time you are experiencing change of any kind–bear in mind what might help you so that you don’t keep getting in your own way. Recognize what you can change and what you can’t, don’t give your power away to a situation you have no power over and then take it back for yourself. THAT is how you surf. It’s not about being okay with all the change or the situation, it’s about self preservation so you can rise again, stronger than ever before.
xoxo,
Trin 💖
“Tell me to embrace change one more f*cking time I’m gonna lose my sh*t”
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