25 and 26 have been notably the most formative years yet. Nothing and everything is happening all at once. It’s constantly a hamster wheel of peaks and valleys but lately there has been many more valleys than peaks. I am bombarded with the disastrous excitement of my future, at the same time I am bombarded with shitty finances, car trouble out the ass, and lots of assholes who think the world bends to them.
This takes me back to my very first blog post and the idea that inspired it all. According to society, instead of making my rent payment and fixing my car engine, I should be blissfully traveling the world not thinking about how much my tax return will give me. If you’re in a position to travel and do whatever you want in your 20s then amazing! Go for it! But for the rest of us having a three day weekend is almost as exciting as not having to cook for dinner or make our lunch for the next day at work.
I crave those things. I want to travel and know more peace financially emotionally and spiritually. I want a house, I want my dog to have a bigger backyard, I want to have time to meal prep everything in little glass containers. Lately my theme has been this: I’m living in a constant state of reminding myself to accept where I’m at, and be utterly OK with it. Yes that means being OK with my car heater breaking, being OK with my 9 to 5 job, being ok with a Chicken McMuffin for dinner when the grocery funds fall short.
BUT what if I’m NOT cool with it? YES accepting is Key to peace. I preach that til the cows come home but ALSO where’s the instruction manual that tells you how to be ok NOT being ok?? Hello??? Its like I’m riding an unpredictable wave. Sometimes were up, sometimes were down. But always on shaky turf.
Im looking for a new job (YES again), Im considering reapplying to PA school (getting rejected 8 times was not ideal), and now Im gearing up to potentially apply to EMT school as well. WTF is happening honestly. Its like that f*cked up ideology about how we are supposed to balance a social life, romantic life, fitness, sleep, work/goals all at the same time. SO everything is happening at the same time nothing is happening: the job market is bad so I’m not getting many bites, its not time to apply anywhere for anything yet and Im just getting my ass up everyday praying for a miracle of some kind.
HOWEVER there is still a silver lining here.
- I have this lovely lil blog
- 2023 just started
- Coffee is real
- Popcorn is also real
- My dog has a new jacket
SO its not all bad. There a moments throughout my day that remind me to be grateful because although life might be overrated sometimes, we’re navigating this lil blue polluted planet together.
My friends and I went to a cheap comedy show recently, and let me say it was not that good LOL. Yet, at the same time it was awesome. Not only because I was with my good friends, but because I could look around the whole room and see this random group of strangers just smiling and laughing together at the ridiculousness playing out in front of them. They were laughing in a supportive way like “your jokes are bad but love you for entertaining us and trying.” In this disaster of a world, the togetherness gets me through it.
So….to finish I pose a challenge to my readers: Think about some togetherness that you’ve seen lately. Whether time with your family, getting CBD infused IPA with your friends, or sharing a smile with your mechanic because you both know you’re f*cked. Take a moment to sit in that “human-ness” and just know ✨were in this together✨ or whatever 🤪
“$200 for an oil change? You got me f*cked up😂”
CoffeeShopVibes 